Sunday, January 29, 2017

What if...Imagine a World...

It's been hard to focus on writing a family memoir with all that is happening in the United States right now.   My heart grieves.  In working through this grief, the following words made their way to the page - bringing comfort in the knowledge that there is hope.

What If...


What if...
    fear keeps us from thinking clearly and making wise decisions?

What if...
    an "us" versus "them" attitude, if allowed to fester, would lead to our destruction?

What if...
    each of us were to take responsibility for our own actions instead of blaming and punishing others?

What if...
    the perceptions we've given our creator God aren't limited to our personal and corporate beliefs?

Imagine...


Imagine a world where...
   "Perfect Love" has the ability to take away our fear if we let it.

Imagine a world where...
    we value others not like us, by spending time with and listening to their stories; discovering our common humanity.

Imagine a world where...
    each of us takes responsibility for our actions - apologizing and making amends when we've caused another harm.

Imagine a world where...
   each of us knows how it feels to be valued, nurtured and comforted by the presence of our creator "God" - author of "Perfect Love".

Imagine a world where...
   there is Peace.

Note:  With the conclusion of this blog and a brighter outlook, the memoir writing continues.

Saturday, December 31, 2016

Relationship

Background Photo Credit: www.pixabay.com
Are you yearning for closeness in a relationship? Are you willing to take steps toward intimacy?

It's in using the principles that follow that  I am currently writing a family memoir. By fostering a relationship with my great Aunt Anna Bella and paying attention to what she had to offer, I learned about the events that would shape her life and her "fully engaged" personality. For more on my great aunt click on this link
("A Picture on the Wall.")

The Principles


A relationship becomes stronger when we listen.  For a verbal processor it can be hard to keep from talking long enough to hear the person you’re with. Can you identify? I can.

“Commit” to being present. “Focus” on the person you are with.  “Listen” and “hear” all of what they are sharing.  It takes putting one’s own needs aside and shutting off the inner chatter of your mind. Hear their inner desires without judgment.
 
“Reflect” back to them by showing that you hear and understand. You can do this by saying something like: “It sounds like you mean ___” or “____ really seems painful for you.”  When someone feels heard they’ll “discover” what’s troubling them and be able to put it in perspective.

You’ll know you’re on the right track when their face and shoulders relax and their voice softens. They've reached an Ah-ha moment.  It's that moment when they've figured out what is at the core of their distress.  They begin to “heal”. Watch and hear them become “energized” as they share a “solution” that is uniquely their's.

Closeness abounds when a person feels that they are understood. Their gratitude is evident.

Relationship Recap

Commit 
to being present.

Focus
on the person you’re with.

Listen
carefully.

Hear
what is being said.

Reflect
back what you’ve heard, briefly.

Discovery
will happen if you let it.

Healing
begins.

Solution
found.

The more present we are in a relationship the closer we'll get.

If  you've found this post helpful, feel free to click "Share".  Also, I'd appreciate hearing what you think.

Resources:  The Zen of Listening by Rebecca Z. Shafir, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven Covey, and Listening Made Easy by Robert L. Montgomery

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

A Father's Love - Halifax Explosion

This year’s December 1st lighting of the Tree for Boston on the Common marks the 99th Anniversary of the Halifax Explosion.   I am eternally grateful for all the aid given by the Canadians, Americans, and other countries.  For without this life giving generosity many more would have died.  Thank you for the gift of family.

What follows is a short remembrance based on my great grandfather Michael Landry's experience.

9:00am
December 6, 1917
Halifax, Nova Scotia

It’s a warm beautiful sunny day in December.

Sixty one year old, widowed dad, Michael is at his job at the Round House about a half mile from home.

He’s walking toward a rust colored freight car parked next to an outbuilding.  His job is to clean the car. Michael walks between the building and the car, unlatches and slides open the door, then climbs in to assess what needs to be done.  Before he can open the door on the other side, he feels the ground rumbling.  As its force increases, he’s knocked off his feet.  The large metal box shakes violently.  There’s a deafening sound reverberating within its walls as Michael’s body is jostled about.  Abruptly it stops.  Silence.  
Shops C.G.R. adjacent to the Round House – Photo #36
(Halifax Relief Commission Photos  Mass. State library)

Lying on the floor, Michael lifts his head and turns toward the door.  The air feels heavy and it’s dark outside. Getting up, he makes his way to the door and climbs down.  As he rounds the car, he sees a debris field containing a mixture of splintered wood, glass fragments, and shattered equipment.   There’s a huge dark cloud hovering over the harbor.

My family, he thinks as he stumbles through the debris and heads toward home.    

Oh, God, my family, my two girls.  He starts running out of the yard.

C.G.R. Round House – Photo #41
(Halifax Relief Commission Photos  Mass. State library)
As he's running, he thinks about his two girls and how he'd hugged them before he left for work. 

He thinks about his older daughter, fourteen year old Anna Bella at home doing the household chores; something she's done since her mother's death in January.  Elizabeth, age eleven, is at school.

He continues to run. The usual landmarks are missing.   Somehow his internal compass takes over as he makes his way down what was Young Street to look for Elizabeth.  The time it takes him to reach St. Joseph’s School feels like an eternity. The closer he gets the worse it looks. Houses are in various stages of demolition.   

As he approaches the parishes block, he sees there’s no roof on the church and the walls are barely standing.   The school is a windowless bulged-out mess.  A set of stairs has collapsed, so he moves around the building to discover a few children and a couple nuns covered in blood with soldiers assisting them.  

"Has anyone seen Elizabeth Landry?" he asks.  
“She’s not here,” said Sister Cecilia.

Burnt District – Photo #16
(Halifax Relief Commission Photos  Mass. State library)
Michael heads down the hill.  He smells the burning ruins and flesh.  Human carnage is strewn about the ground with cries of anguish coming from under the wreckage.  Soldiers and civilians are pulling people from the rubble.   Fireman using their equipment are doing their best to keep the fires at bay, but there aren’t enough of them.  

He fears that Anna Bella may have perished. It appears that the area where the house stood is now totally burned. 

In front of  him, the injured are being loaded onto horse drawn carts and motor powered vehicles. Running from one to the other he checks for his two girls. It is hard to find them since most everyone is unrecognizable. He continues his frantic search.
  
Then he hears, "Papa, we're over here!" 

He turns to see two girls, seated and holding each others hands, on the back of a buckboard. One has a swollen face and is covered with blood and dirt.  The other is covered with plaster dust.  

"Anna Bella, Elizabeth!"
"Yes, Papa, it's us," says Elizabeth.

Michael moves to them and wraps them in his arms

----------------------
To read more about the family during the explosion at "A Picture on the Wall."

Permission granted for photos used in this blog:  Folder #17 Photos 1-79, MS Coll. 90 Massachusetts-Halifax Relief Committee Records. State Library of Massachusetts Special Collections.

Monday, October 31, 2016

Writer to Writer - Hamilton and Miranda


Cal Shook - York Harbor, Maine
Motivational tools for writers and other artists are provided when two authors from two different centuries’ lives intersect.

Imagine writing yourself into the history of one of the greatest countries on earth and you weren’t born there.  Alexander Hamilton wrote his way from a tiny Island in the Caribbean to
free passage to America.  Once there he would gain admission to education and work his way up to become an influential force in shaping what would become the United States of America.

As an immigrant, Hamilton embraced his new life and opportunities.  His ability to communicate his fresh perspective would create a revolution that would change the course of history for generations to come.

Fast forward to the 21st Century and meet writer/artist, Lin-Manuel Miranda, the son of an immigrant. Lin-Manuel becomes enthralled by the life of Alexander Hamilton.  Six years in the making, his hip hop Broadway musical, “Hamilton”, is performed to sold-out crowds.

How in the world does a “rapping” musical about American history become a much sought after production?  The PBS special “Hamilton’s America” offers keen insights to what it takes to become an accomplished author.  Thanks to Lin-Manuel’s openness and candor the following motivational tools are revealed.


Tool #1:  Write as though time is running out.


Our time here on earth is limited.  Be obsessed – let it all hang out.

Just as Hamilton wrote wherever and whenever he could using his portable desk, Lin-Manuel did the same letting all the rhymes in his head make their way out onto the word processor on his laptop.

Tool #2:  Know your subject intimately.


Lin-Manuel was inspired by author Ron Chernow’s book, “Alexander Hamilton”.  Its 832 pages provided an extensive look into the life of this great man – warts and all. Not only did Lin-Manuel use this creative work, he also traveled to historic sights to gain further insight into the look and feel of the era in which Hamilton lived.

Tool #3:  Take a risk and keep it real.


Test it out by taking a risk, but make sure it’s real – authentic.

“I have thought it my duty to exhibit things as they are, not as they ought to be.”  – Alexander Hamilton, Letter of August 13, 1782

The first song Lin-Manuel created was blunt and edgy in its portrayal of Hamilton’s life.  How would it be received?   An opportunity presented itself when he was invited to sing a song from “The Heights” to close out an evening of artists at the White House.  Instead he decided to sing this new song that he’d just written about Hamilton.  As his performance ended, the audience rose to their feet in solidarity with applause.

Tool #4:  Set deadlines and meet them.


After two plus years and only two songs, Lin-Manuel realized that he needed to get moving if this was going to be more than just a couple songs.  To remedy this, he set deadlines and met them.

Tool #5:  Tap into the talent around you – Collaborate.


Feedback from others is essential no matter what type of work you’re creating.

Not only did Lin-Manuel have conversations with fellow author Ron Chernow, he held what he called Cabinet Meetings with a core group that would help spur the production forward.  Collaboration with authors/artists can help determine whether your words are making sense and assure that they fit the totality of the work.

In Closing:


Alexander Hamilton’s life inspired Lin-Manuel Miranda and thanks to them and the PBS special “Hamilton’s America”* I am feeling energized.  The tools mentioned above, along with testimonials accompanied by music and other visuals provided in this special, are motivating me to write whenever and wherever I can.  The next draft of the memoir about my paternal grandfather Joe's family is under way.  The time to get it done is “now”.

What's your "now"?

*Note:  The video "Hamilton's America" on PBS will expire on November 18, 2016

Friday, September 30, 2016

Don’t Quit!

Don’t quit, my friend, hang in there.

Sometimes when we feel like we’re at the breaking point and about to give up, a new breakthrough is right around the corner.

Last week I came pretty close to losing it as I stepped back to review the memoir that I’m working on.

A Reflection on Last Week


Many years of research and writing are in front of me and it’s not a pretty site. Some sections of  the narrative are intertwined with details and free flowing thought that leave them sounding chaotic. This is not what I expected this draft to look like. Yuck.  

Feeling discouraged and not wanting to quit, I decide to take a short break. Fortunately, my husband Jim and I had already scheduled two days with family and friends. It provided a wonderful diversion.


A New Perspective


Rested and renewed I return to my writing room.  Sitting with paper and pen in hand, I remember a blog post by Cal Armistead - “How do Your Write a Book? First, You Start with a Lump of Clay…

Rereading Cal’s article was like getting a shot of adrenaline.  Maybe it’s not a chaotic mess, but a lump of clay that is taking shape. If I stick with it, it will continue to take form. It will become a complete work in its time.


Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Politically Distracted?

Are you finding this political season a bit of a distraction? I am.

Expressing political opinions has reached an all-time low. The words we use do matter.

Much of the rhetoric coming from the varying political persuasions is laced with labeling, judging, name calling, and fact distortion. Polarization appears to be the norm. How is a person to make an informed decision based on comparing the facts when they are buried beneath the hype?

Prayers please…

Just for today may we have the courage to move beyond the publicity and seek out the facts.

May we have:
Ears that hear,
Eyes that see, a
Mind that explores,
Arms that embrace, a
Heart that loves, and
Feet that move.

Your life and circumstances matter.  Using a variety of sources can be helpful in uncovering the facts. A lot is at stake this election season and each of us can make a difference, one person - one vote at a time.  

Friday, July 29, 2016

Thrive

How can we thrive?

a variety of shoes along a stone wall





















The 20 words below are an experiment in "brevity with meaning" as I contemplated the question, "How can we thrive?"  My prayer is that all may thrive!

Thrive
by Cal Shook

Need
Lack
Poverty
Decay

Plenty
More
Accumulate
Hoard

Shoes
Yours 
Mine
Switch

Walk
Experience
Understand
Empathize

Listen
Collaborate
Abundance
Thrive